Honest email signatures

Via

Chair leg of truth.

I want a wise and terrible chair leg of truth. Oh the fun I would have...
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I love my records

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Cards for every occasion

Could be very handy with V-day coming up.
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Brilliant advice

The only problem with that Buddha is that common sense is not that common.
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If you teach a mouse....

Click to embiggen.

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Pew Pew Pew

Look out!
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PAWS

Just when you thought it was safe to back to the sofa....
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No heart this year

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Things that are hard to say when you are drunk

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

1. No thanks, I’m married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
4. No thanks, I’m not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7.. I’m not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool!
9.. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

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Tom and Jerry: Reality

Well, yes. But he would have played with him a bit first.
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Catching a Predator

Click to embiggen.

Tee hee. Predator jizz.
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Breakfast Club

Still one of my favourite movies.
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People who annoy you...

It's an 'A' Randy. Naggers. The answer is naggers.
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Ninja Valentine

*Sigh* So romantic.
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Google before you Tweet

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Earlobes and nipples

Click to embiggen.

Well that's weird.
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Take some protection

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New date rape drug - men beware!!

Click to embiggen.

Geez, ruin the fun for all of us predatory women....

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Porn rating scale

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Paper Scissors Rock

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It's gone.

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Curious emoticons

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Valentines for hopeless realists

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The all new iMug

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Mythbusters 007

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Big hug?

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Anatomy of a hug

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Vampire Bad-ass-ness

Click to embiggen.

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How to really love your teenager.

Really?
Only very wrong.
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Bear chat

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Hang in there!

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Adult Sheep Finder

Click to embiggen.

My favourite part is the "Looking for" box - discreet sheep, 'shaved' sheep.
Extremely brilliant.
Via email. (Thanks Mum!).

Never turn to sheep

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Eliminate horniness

But what if I don't want to?!?!
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It's all a matter of perspective

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Duct tape Duct tape Duct tape

Click to embiggen.

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Riding Donald

And he looks like he is enjoying it too.
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Sandra Bullock's new movie

I'll only watch it if Lord Vadar kills her in the end.
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My Pokemon brings all the boys to the yard....

Click to embiggen.

Love it.
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Horatio does it again

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All about sausage

That really should be the name of a porno.
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Cheez

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Zombie Emergency Procedure

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All boys take note:

Oh and girls: the same goes for perfect boys.
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Superb Cast

The cast is awesome, but the plot has been gone for years.
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Yawnomatopoeia

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Monkey Brain

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Chuck Norris doesn't die

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True beauty

Click to embiggen.

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