Saturday, January 31, 2009

Cuddly toys of death

I want one!
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Huh?

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Totally wasted

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When do you feel happiness?

I am fresh feelings.
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Hmmmm.... I don't think it worked.

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Murder and masturbation: A winning combination

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15 Homer Simpson Quotes



1. Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get.

2. Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

3. What’s the point of going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway.

4. I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.

5. Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.

6. Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin… but what good does that do me?

7. I hope I didn’t brain my damage.

8. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals… except the weasel.

9. Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

10. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

11. Old people don’t need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.

12. Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that’s even remotely true!

13. How could you?! Haven’t you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn’t hear anybody laughing, did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects. Makes sound effects and laughs. Where was I? Oh yeah! Stay out of my booze.

14. You don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way.

15. Oh, I’m in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I don’t have to listen to myself. I’m drunk.

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Really?

Via email (Thanks Sascha!).

Something kinda slutty

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What 80's Karaoke Song are you?




You Are "Time After Time"



If you were transported back to the 80s, your life would be all about reflecting.

You're a serious, earnest person - and you couldn't help but think a lot about how things were back then.



You'd spend a lot of your time writing, researching, and learning.

You would either become a social anthropologist - or a crazy guru with a knack for predicting the future.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Parking

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Suicide Bear

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Bert Island

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Wrestle Rescue

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Interesting dessert....

I'll pass thanks.
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Faking Human Emotions

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Be afraid.

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A summary of life in 4 bottles

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Get a free cookie.

Something I stumbled upon.

Melting, melting....

Melbourne is currently sweltering under the worst stretch of hot weather in recorded history - the past three days have been around 45 deg celsius (113 deg F) and it is going to remain very hot for the next week. I'm melting!
Pic via email (Thanks Janine!).

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Johnny?!?!?

Is there a midget-mart? A category on eBay?
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A time sex thing?

What?!?!!
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Between the lines


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Does that mean you can cut up in the emo toilet?

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Damn invisibility

It can be very inconvenient.
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Laziness

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Reset Button

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Sweet 16.

How Many 90 Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?
I'm a little disappointed with my effort.

This cat is taking Mobwars too seriously.....

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Serial Killing in 3 easy steps

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Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Good thing they have ears and trunks

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Tom Cruise, Nutbag.

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While we are on a theme.....

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Finding Jesus

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Family planing

So I assume that means they get a woodwork plane and plane off members of your family that you don't want/need anymore. Could be quite useful really.
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Sexual Harrassment

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Innocence is sexier than you think.

Tell that to Pedo Bear.
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Reach Out Touch Faith

Another shirt with random words!
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Development of language

I proceeded straight to the last one.
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Who's the boss?

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Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Wanna have sex?

Subtle.

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Hairy Hearts

Eeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
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Choking Hazard

Via email.
(Thanks Sascha!)

Invincible Moose

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Gonna love it

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Clowns

Via From

Tight dependence this instantaneous eternal

Soft love?

Happee nowz?

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Tech Support

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