Why the bad mood?

Via

I'm not fat....

They're not pet peeves....

Via

You poop for real....

Via

Science!!!

Me too.

Run Pandas, Run!

Via

Best friend got the girl

It's clogged

Via

The inspiration for the internet

Chuck & Beans

I love everybody

Via

No change

Via

Reactions to movie endings

Sofa Pizza

It is not this day

Via

Yeaaahhhh!!!

Poorly Drawn Lines

Prejudiced against dragons

Love it.
Via Reddit.

Actually, I'm both.

Via

Engrish Aliens

Via

Something seems different

Via

You seem to have mistaken me for a grown up.

Every.  Damn.  Day.
xkcd

Closets are for clothes

Brilliant
Via

Not always, but often

Via

Damn alarm

Poorly Drawn Lines

Nap Time

Via

My philosophy exactly

Via

While you were out

Via

Pleading Famous

It works here in Oz too - an AFL footballer was just acquitted of rape after having sex with someone who was unconscious when he began, and then asked him to stop once she realised what was happening.  Maybe she consented by default just be being there, in the presence of such greatness.  Who am I to judge.
Savage Chickens

Only ten years to go

Via

Auto cucumber

God donut.

Freeloader

Via

But only probably

Vimrod

Rush to judgement

Via

You get what you pay for

And I think I would be afraid to ask anyway, with that grumpy face.
Via

The wrong bar

Via

Kicking back

I want to rub that belly!
Via

This much

Via

Hard drive recovery

Invisible Bread

Shhh, they might hear you

Via

The time is now!

Everyday People

Increased probablility

Some Ecards

Landing strip

Via

Amusement Parks: Kids Vs Adults

Pleated Jeans

It will tear you apart

Either that or you will tear your own eyes out after watching it.  Some have called it the worst movie of all time.  It is worth watching just so you know just how bad a movie can be.  See the imdb entry here.
Via

Countdown to Alarm

I always used to do this, then a friend taught me her trick.  When you wake up, instead of "oh no!  Only two hours left to sleep" you say to yourself  "Awesome! Two more hours to sleep!"  Works very nicely for me.
Via

Any sodium jokes?

Via Reddit

Duck you Auto Correct

I have often told someone "I can't ducking believe it" or the like.  Stupid ducking auto correct.
The Frogman

Classy family

Viatastefullyoffensive.tumblr.com

Reach Out!

Married to the Sea

Damn side effects

Some Ecards