Saturday, May 28, 2011

Rock Bottom

  • “People’s Choice Award” is America’s greatest honor.
  • Styrofoam is not made from kittens. 
  • The U.F.O was a paper plate. 
  • The nerds on the internet are not geeks. 
  • The word “cheese” is not funny in and of itself. 
  • The older Flanders boy is Todd, not Rod. 
  • Lyndon Johnson did not provide the voice of Yosemite Sam. 
  • If you are reading this you have no life. 
  • Roy Rogers was not buried inside his horse. 
  • The other U.F.O was an upside down salad spinner. 
  • Our universities are not hotbeds of anything. 
  • Mr. Dershowitz did not literally have four eyes. 
  • Our viewers are not pathetic, sexless food tubes. 
  • Audrey Hepburn never weighed 400 pounds. 
  • The “Cheers” gang is not a real gang. 
  • Salt water does not “chase the thirsties away”. 
  • Licking an electrical outlet will not turn you into a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger. 
  • Cats do not eventually turn into dogs. 
  • Bullets do not bounce off of fat guys. 
  • Recycling does not deplete the ozone. 
  • Everything is 10% fruit juice. 
  • The flesh eating virus does not hide in ice cream. 
  • Janet Reno is evil. 
  • V8 juice is not 1/8 gasoline. 
  • Ted Koppel is a robot. 
  • Women aren’t from Venus and men aren’t from Mars. 
  • Fleiss does floss. 
  • Quayle is familiar with common bathroom procedures. 
  • Bart is bad to the bone. 
  • Godfry Jones’ wife is cheating on him. 
  • The Beatles haven’t reunited to enter kick boxing competitions. 
  • The “Bug” on your tv screen can see into your home. 
  • Everyone on tv is better than you. 
  • The people who are writing this have no life.


Quique said...

JAjajajjajaja, muy muy muy bueno, ta lo agradezco de corazón! Igual te digo: "A mi no me patean" (Bart vs Australia) ;)

Quique said...
This comment has been removed by the author.